It's the end of January already

 It's been a minute since I wrote on this blog. I guess I lost my way a bit about what route I wanted to go down and I got in my head a bit about that. Do I want to discuss personal finance? Do I want to talk about being a mother? Or do I solely want to focus on my own fitness journey? What will other people actually want to read? 

Then I realised, it doesn't matter what my readers want to read. What matters is what I actually enjoy writing about and that's all of it! I renamed my blog Amberlou's Wellness Diaries a few months ago, because this means I can cover a plethora of topics without having to focus on just one niche. I love to write and I am far superior at writing than I am at speaking. I will keep honing in on that skill whilst continuing to write and build on this one. Just because I am not great at it doesn't mean I shouldn't practice it in order to improve. That goes for many things in life. If you're not a runner, doesn't mean you shouldn't try running and practice it regularly. You might just surprise yourself.

Today I specifically want to talk about the last 4 weeks, specifically with regards to my current fat loss phase. Multiple people asked me why I was even bothering to spend money on another coaches programme in order to drop body fat because I was already a healthy weight, had a healthy routine around exercise and had a pretty healthy diet. The thing is, when you're the sort of person that is always looking to improve, then you already know why I wanted to do it. Because I can be better.

So far, the course has taught me a few things I was not expecting.

1. I have an unhealthy attachment to food and often fall into emotional eating

2. I was not lifting heavy enough in the gym

Two things that would not have been highlighted had I not committed to an 8 week fat loss programme. So if you ask me, it's already money well spent because I am now working on educating myself further on the subject of emotional eating and working out ways to detach myself from my emotional connection with food and I am pushing myself harder than ever in the gym hitting numbers I never thought would be possible only two years after having my second child. 

Coaching really does work, even this form of group coaching that I am a part of. Which has given me another kick up the bum to keep pushing my own product. I get in my head a lot. I go through cycles of telling myself that my business will not be successful - obviously in relation to where I am in my monthly cycle. My luteal phase can be a right bully. Yet I have clients that have had amazing results whom I have built a brilliant relationship with. So I know my product is one worth talking about. I promise myself I will do it more.

So far, the scale weight has consistently gone down on average each week. What a surprise since the numbers simply do not lie! I could talk about how a calorie deficit will get you dropping body fat until the end of time. I know, I've done it twice. Yet this time round it feels way tougher. Probably because I am already a low body weight so my deficit is low. Plus incorporating 15k steps into my day along with breastfeeding. Let's just say I am glad I don't work a 9-5 because I'm not sure if I could fit it all in!

At the other end of that, being a working from home stay at home school gate mum also comes with its own challenges. 

The baby refuses to go in the carrier when it's time for steps.

Or he falls asleep at school pick up time then is grouchy for the rest of the afternoon because I had to wake him up after 5 minutes - work gets delayed.

The planning and preparing of all of the meals for all of the people in the household. My 6 year old doesn't want chicken and broccoli. Often I'm cooking three separate meals. 

Keeping up with the washing when my partner and I both go to the gym and run.

You catch my drift. I am the household manager, personal chef, launderer, business owner, mother, partner, sister, daughter. But I still think it's really important to make time for the activities that are important to me - Amber. 

Because before I was a household manager, mother and a business owner, I was an individual who fell in love with becoming the strongest, healthiest version of herself. Both in body and mind. I regularly have to remind myself that I am still her. My morals and values around building a healthy lifestyle will always be at the forefront of my mind because my children are watching. 

They are taking notice of my gym schedule, of the meals we eat, of the activities we do at the weekends. They are watching. Children will replicate what they see, not what they're told. Which is another reason why I am so glad I took the plunge and started my coaching journey again because there's a chance that my children were watching me comfort eat and that's not a habit I want them to bring into their own routine. I want to encourage a healthy attachment to food. I want them to see food as a neutral thing. This is not the way I was brought up and it's a skill I am having to learn as I go.

There's 5 more weeks left of the programme (I'm currently in the middle of week 4) and I am really excited to see how far I can push myself. Both in the scale weight but also in the gym. My confidence has sky rocketed in the last three weeks and I am certain I am going to be hitting more PR's over the coming weeks.

I'll leave my rambling there for now. I have so much more to write about I am really excited to be more consistent with writing here. Hopefully my readers will use these blogs as a little hit of motivation on gloomy days or find comfort in the slower format of reading over doom scrolling.

Until next time, Amber xo